Litigious: how can such a pretty sounding word carry so much evil?

My coffe cup lid of choice is the old one, the tear away, perforated tab that leaves you with a good quarter-inch square to drink from. The alternative is the sippy-cup, Starbucks lid that just blows. My guess is that after the spilled-coffe lawsuit against McDonalds that awarded a plaintiff $2.9 million, big companies like Starbucks and Dunkin' Donuts decided to go exclusively with the handi-capable, safety lids.

Another one is the door locks on my Ford shitbox--I forget what model I have. Every door locks automatically whenever the ignition is turned on. Were there that many kids and senile old people chucking themselves out of moving cars? Please. Coincidentally, It's when I leave the car running, to get my morning coffee, that I am most often thwarted by this bullshit safety feature.

Have you heard how they're installing voice recordings of anti-drunk driving messages in urinals? So, you go to use the restroom at a bar or night club, and the urinal tries to have an impromptu heart-to-heart about your drinking. I don't know, that might be the last straw for me. If I'm drunk, I can really see myself tearing some snobby, patronizing toilet right out of the wall and pissing on it's shattered face.